Efficiency December 27, 2011

(above) Self-Portrait No. 45 (detail)

I’m not sure whether I’m being lazy or efficient today, as I polished off both No. 45 and No. 46 by 1pm. Hopefully I was being efficient; I’m constantly striving for efficiency in all parts of my life.  After I complete any task, anything from a simple task like chopping a tomato to a more complex one like organizing my course syllabi, I find myself compulsively analyzing in my head how I could do it again, but better.  I’m constantly formulating strategies in my mind to prepare for the next time I do something so that I’m prepared and ready to take care of any glitches that happened the first time through.

My drawing technique especially is something that I’m always trying to improve upon with every mark I make. As I’ve discussed in the past, I’m relying more and more on the etching ink work to carry the piece which means less time and labor with the lithographic crayon and exacto knife.   I’m definitely pickier about what areas I choose to add detail to, which overall gives the portrait a more spontaneous look. I think the sheer quantity of portraits in this project has forced me to become quicker and more efficient, I feel that there is a momentum and pace that I have to keep up to maintain the energy that I’m looking for. I worry that if I linger for too long on any image that the project slows down and I lose that freshness of the marks that I want to achieve. After working on this series, it’s become clear to me that I get motivated by quantity and a high turnover rate; I’m not someone who can labor over an image or two for months at a time. I like the feeling of being productive and seeing fast results, and a high quantity of images is definitely one way to satisfy that need.

(above) Self-Portrait No. 45

(above) Self-Portrait No. 46

Standstill December 22, 2011

(above) No. 49

Today was a frustrating day in the studio. I had just barely enough etching ink left to begin work on No. 49, but afterwards couldn’t start any new pieces because I was out of etching ink. I worked on the exacto knife and lithographic crayon portion of No. 44, but was struggling because small sections of the portrait weren’t entirely dry. I forced myself to get through the piece and finish it. The other portraits I have  in the studio weren’t nearly dry enough to work on, so I had to stop there. Generally speaking I’m pretty good about having everything organized so that I don’t get myself into these standstills, but unfortunately that wasn’t the case today.

I generally see full days in the studio to be a complete luxury that I have to relish every moment of, so it kills me when I find myself watching the clock as I work. I kept trying to refocus by thinking to myself “form, structure, gesture”, but I spent the majority of the day in a state of distraction.

(above) No. 44

Do or Die December 21, 2011

(above) redo No. 8 in progress

Today I focused exclusively on working on the etching ink portion of the process. I was going to go into the others with the exacto knife, but the drawings weren’t quite entirely dry. I’ve been trying to turn my brain off and not think so much when I work on the etching ink.  Lately the etching ink has been feeling like a “do or die” type of situation. I don’t like putting that kind of pressure on myself because it’s really distracting to the drawing process, but its completely true:  if the etching ink work isn’t strong, continuing with the portrait would be like kicking a dead horse.   I know that there’s not much I can do with the lithographic crayon and exacto knife to fix it.  I hate to render such harsh judgment on a piece so early in the process, but every time I’ve proceeded with a portrait I didn’t feel good about I always ended up scrapping the piece in the end.

Doing so much etching ink work in one day has definitely gotten me to recognize my odd quirks and habits.  I’m right handed, and I’ve noticed that the majority of the image is smeared into the Dura-Lar with my middle finger.  I use my middle and pointer finger to blend and shade light passages, and my thumb to fill large areas of black. In general, the etching ink work accounts for about 80% of the finished image, and generally takes about 60-90 minutes to complete.

(above) redo No. 5 in progress

no. 50 in progress

Comparisons December 20, 2011

I’ve been working on a lot of the redos this week, with varying degrees of success.

This redo of No. 1(above left) is probably the most dramatic; when I was working on this first portrait I had no idea what I was doing in terms of technique, and I feel like I absolutely butchered the form, overworked the surface, and completely lost any sense of gesture.  As a result, any redo was destined to be better no matter what.  The redo is done from a different photograph, of nearly the same expression, so it does also help that I had a better reference photograph.

This redo of No. 8(above left) is done from the exact same photograph as version 1 . While I think the redo is better than version 1, there are too many things that bother me about the redo for me to accept it.  I think the reference photograph wasn’t great to begin with, and it really shows in this case.  This portrait is getting scrapped and going to be replaced with an entirely new image.

I scrapped this original image of No. 21; (above left)  the reference photograph that I was using was lousy, and the facial expression doesn’t really work either. I think the redo on the above right is a significant improvement.

(above) redo of No. 10 in progress.

Focus December 19, 2011

This week is entirely dedicated to my studio work, the first time in many months that I’ve had a substantial chunk of uninterrupted time. It’s wonderful to “relax” this way, it gives me time to breathe and think about the work in a way that I simply can’t manage to do when the semester is in full swing. When I have a full day in the studio, I like to mix up the various tasks so that I’m not stuck doing one action all day long.  It sounds like a contradiction, but breaking things up helps me focus better.

Below is a redo of No. 10; it’s a completely new expression, but to me the portraits still retains some similarities to the first version. I found this one really challenging because there is simply no distortion of the face involved here, it’s in many ways the most “beautiful” expression in the entire series. The more contorted the face is, the “easier” it is to manage.  I found the forehead to be especially difficult simply because it’s just so undefined as a form. There are no wrinkles to structure the form, so I’m left with a large form that allows for very little definition.

Below is the original version of No. 10:

Wellesley College Drawing Studio December 16, 2011

Classes are over at Wellesley, so today I started hanging up several drawings in the drawing studio to see how they are starting to look as a group.  I noticed that I “forgot” what the earlier drawings looked like, so it was refreshing to be able to revisit them. I also observed several changes in my drawing technique, it seems like these latest drawings have much higher tonal contrast, and tend to use more white of the page. By comparison, the earlier drawings tend to use small portions of the white of the page and have more grey distributed throughout the entire piece. It’s always fascinating to me the way one’s work evolves and changes over the period of creating a series. This is especially true in this series because of the sheer quantity of images that I’ll be producing.

I also got to work on the initial etching ink work on No. 45 and No. 44. It felt great to work with etching ink again after so many sessions with just the lithographic crayon and exacto knife.

Self-Portrait No. 7, version 2 December 14, 2011

(above) version 2

(above) version 1

With final crits last week and this week I’ve been away from these portraits for a for a little while. Today was really productive, I finished version 2 of No. 7 in the morning, and in the afternoon I had another photo session with Marianna along with some life drawing as well. I’ve done multiple photo sessions now, and it’s always amazing to me that she’s able to come up with new content no matter how many times we do a session.  With eight more portraits to complete, this may well be the last round of photography that I need to do.

It’s really interesting to do a side-by-side comparison between the two versions of No. 7:, I think overall the gesture of version 2 is better in that the facial expression seems more extreme.  Looking at version 1, it feels quite reserved by comparison. Version 2 also seems overdone, I was less selective at the time about where I put the details, so I ended up putting them everywhere making for a less efficient drawing.  The one part of version 1 that I do like better is the mouth; somehow the distortion of the mouth is a little more extreme and therefore more effective.

(above) detail, version 2

Redos December 5, 2011

I worked on the details of my redo of No. 7 this afternoon. This is the first redo that I’ve worked on in any depth; the rest of them have etching ink on them but that’s it for now. I get anxious about these redos, because I have a fear that the second time through will be worse than the first time through. If that does become the case, I would have to scrap the image entirely and do something completely new. Redos are definitely new territory for me; in the past I’ve simply moved on when something wasn’t quite working, but I’m determined this time around to feel strongly about all fifty portraits.

The temptation now is to keep looking at the original drawing to “make sure” that the redo is better. I kept comparing the original drawing in my head as I worked this new one. I’m trying hard not to do this, as it’s really distracting, but it’s hard not to. I can thankfully say that the redo today is already better than the original drawing. I think it’s more dimensional, higher in contrast, and has a greater range of greys than before.

Another part of me wants to validate that I’ve progressed and developed through these redos. Many of the redos I’m doing were executed early on in the project, when I had a concrete sense of technique and approach, so it’s interesting to see what I’m doing differently the second time through.